Limbo Land

I have found in my short 32 years that there is a weird phenomenon that happens once "we" start to get married, get pregnant, have a baby. Everyone is in a stage...and if you are not in the same stage as someone else, well then to put it bluntly you are disregarded or in limbo land.

Let me explain, I didn't get married until I was 31. I now say I was lucky enough to find my husband when I was ready but yes it was a little later then some. So when I was single, it was obvious that to some people that I couldn't possibly understand what it was like to be in a relationship and understand the complexity that it entailed. Regardless of the fact that I was a grown women and had experienced many things in my life.

So, after I was married everyone around me started getting pregnant and having babies, now I was in a new category. Not single anymore but not pregnant and then not a mother. So again, it was obvious that to some people, I couldn't possibly understand what it was like to be pregnant or have a child. Which yes, this is true. I do not know what it is like to be 38 weeks pregnant or have endless sleepless nights, or know all the ins and outs of breastfeeding or diaper changing or....well you know..... But let me try to make you understand...I AM NOT AN IDIOT. I have nephews, god daughters, friends with babies, so maybe I don't know the finite details, I do understand that your 5 month old baby does not eat steak and that he/she is not going to go to the bathroom all by her/him self. And in regards to pregnancy, yes maybe I don't know what it feels like to have a baby kick inside me but I have done enough research on the subject to make your head spin...and just because I am not pregnant doesn't mean I don't get to have opinions on how I would like my pregnancy/child birth to go. Just because you had a baby, does not make you all knowing...no...nooo...nooooo it really doesn't.

So the next time you decide to leave the woman out who is in limbo land of your friendship or discussion please remember, just because I am not in the same "stage" you are does not mean I am not interested or might even...just a thought...have an opinion or an idea that might help you.